Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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