The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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