I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
