i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
