So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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