life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
