ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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