I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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