I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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