dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
