I'm really into asian looking animals
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
