sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize