Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
worst night to have a conscience
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
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