Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
True strength comes from lack of pants
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
