we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
