I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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