No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
