his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize