69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
