I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
