i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
