I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
