Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
