did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
