Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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