I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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