Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
party gras won. party gras always wins.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
