She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
