So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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