All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
