I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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