Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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