And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
