so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
