I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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