i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
