He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
