Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
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