ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
