i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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