Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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