did you get engaged???
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
