you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
