Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
