i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
