Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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