if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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