I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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