Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
