so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
